Hello 2019 ~ One Little Word & 52 Weeks of Being Me

HELLO 2019

Monday ~ 1.7.19

I've been away for a couple of years. 2018 was a tough year, but I'm determined to get myself in a place of PEACE and challenge myself to create new healthy habits this year. My friend, Tina Zarlenga has motivated me over the past couple years with trying to get back to writing. She amazes me with ALL that she accomplishes setting goals and following through each year. Each year she chooses a WORD for the new year, which was an idea she found through Ali Edwards. Here's the link: https://aliedwards.com/one-little-word

Here's Tina's blog link to "Unraveling my Heart the write way - I'll start you in November when she writes about her one little word: https://www.unravelingmyheartthewriteway.com/blog/being-me-a-52-week-soul-searching-journey-15402

                                

I actually started with a mantra for this new year, which lead me to my word. The mantra is, "Let That Shit Go" ~ Buddha. From there it lead me to the word, RELEASE. I'm hoping that focusing on this word will help direct me into some of the things I love to do. Over the past few years I've felt like I don't have the TIME, and or my heart and head hasn't been in the right mindset and space to just DO IT. Well... that's an excuse... and it's also a really good way to STAY STUCK in a place in life where I'm not making any changes... which means I'm getting the same results over and over. And I'm not happy about that. There are days I feel like I'm living in that movie, Ground Hog Day (Bill Murray where he lives the same day over and over). TODAY I feel ready to challenge myself to GROW... to be more intentional in my choices in how I'm living my life.... even if it's not necessarily comfortable.

I'm turning 50 THIS YEAR, so I want to be able to look back at my 49th year as I ease into my 50s feeling more healthy, more accomplished, more at PEACE, more motivated, making a difference for others, and influencing and challenging my children to make happy and healthy choices/changes in their lives as well.  

My friend Tina followed the blog, "Words of me" and her 52 weeks of being me, and she was motivated to incorporate that into the habit of her writing while soul searching at the same time. It's my hope to follow Tina, and utilize this same resources to help me kick start my soul searching....and to get back to the things that I feel are important.... the things that FEEL LIKE the warmth of the sun.... I need to take a hold of that oxygen mask so that I can be a better me for my family.... be a better mom to my chicklets ... a better partner to my hubs.... and a better person in my community and this world in trying to make a difference. 

FYI, 52 weeks of being me website: http://wordsofmeproject.blogspot.com/p/welcome-to-my-year-long-and-free-e-class.html

With that said, I'm going to follow Tina's template and focus on "BEING ME" for my prompts and ideas for my writing and my focus. 

OF COURSE... I'm already behind as we enter the 2nd week of January... but better late than never :0 ! I feel like I have had the courage to document and write about many things in my life. I have shared and put my truth out there with the hope that it will help others. With getting back to my blog and starting THIS "Finding Me" journey, I'm hoping it will start to put me on a path of organizing how I do it... create daily habits... and eventually lead me into feeling more inspired... at peace within.... for my my mind, body, & soul. 

The theme for THIS MONTH, JANUARY is ~ The best time for new beginnings is now

BEING ME  ~ WEEK 1 ~ ROUTINE

I have to admit... most my life I've been an "ALL OR NOTHING" kind of gal. Which is not necessarily good, and has been an obstacle for me in many ways. The part of this personality trait that is GOOD is... if you're my friend... if I love you... I am ALL IN ... I'm passionate about the people and things I care about. I have been told that I am fiercely loyal... and friends have said they love that about me. At the same time, I've made the mistake of expecting others to treat me the same as I treat them. WELL ... LIFE does NOT work that way. I know that now... and I continue to have little reminders as life proceeds. We have to try to NOT have expectations of others. I've learned that it is REALLY important to ACCEPT PEOPLE RIGHT WHERE THEY ARE AT... ACCEPT PEOPLE FOR WHO THEY ARE ..... and NOT put your own expectations on them. We all come from different perspectives and places in this life... so giving people GRACE and not setting them up to fail is a really important practice that can only give YOU more PEACE in the long run. I've worked to try and let go of this rigidness and idealism for perfection, and I feel like I've gotten a little better with it through age. Yet, I still feel like it's a part of my personality that can literally and figuratively WIEGH ME DOWN :( . So while I've said thousands of times that I will JUST DO IT ....and whatever I can do will be ENOUGH... I haven't always followed through. So in this new year... I'm going to work on this on a DAILY basis, and I'm going to be intentional about it. One of my routine things has always been working out...but right now ...and for the past 11 weeks, I've been in a holding pattern. Part of it was my choice to put my fitness journey on hold... but not all of it was in my control. I was sad, frustrated, and angry ... but it was something I needed to do at the time to preserve my peace. My plan was to workout at home... but because I was feeling a loss upon a loss ... I sank into a sad place... and working out in my basement just wasn't something I could push myself to do. This morning I was reviewing my workout schedule/cycles and the last 12 week cycle was mostly bare... hardly any workouts. The cycle before that was from 7/16/18-10/7/18, and I had gone to 73 BOXING CLASSES (lots of doubles) during that cycle, which averaged to 6 PLUS CLASSES/PER WEEK ... but on top of that I was also doing my strength training AND walking here/there. WOW... that's a lot. But THEN there was a crisis that happened... I had been trying to help a dear friend for the past couple of months (August & September)... I was met with betrayal and heartbreak and was left with such a deep sadness. And despite the offenses, I still love this person, worry about them... and care deeply about them.... that doesn't just shut off for me. At the same time, I have to take care of myself and my family. Recently losing someone so dear to me that felt like family... only made the loss of my sister feel incredibly raw again with only having 6 months post her loss. It just pushed me into a place of being stuck again. I'm so sick of being stuck on/off in this life. I get it... but I don't appreciate being in this space in life. 

So here we are kicking off the 1st week of 2019... well the 2nd week - and in all fairness the kiddos were still on break last week - so starting any new routine was NOT going to happen with them still home. So YES... I'm going to kick it off THIS WEEK with and begin MY NEW daily routines TODAY. And I'm going to clear the mindset of the ALL OR NOTHING... and I'm just going to do better than my best to practice doing these routines every day. It's time to JUST DO IT. Now because I've spent today writing... I'm a bit behind... but I'm so HAPPY I am WRITING again... THAT is a GOOD THING for me!!!! 

Here are my routines:

-Wake up thinking about being GRATEFUL

-Prayer

-Spark

-Read a daily quote/vespers and calendar

-Cardio, Lower, or Upper body

-KEEP CALM as I enter the morning routine with the chicklets

-Lemon/Cider vinegar water prior to eating

-Drink at least 8 – 8oz of water a day

-Eat healthy and log food

-Cotninue to track my workouts on the 12 week calendar (BFL) PLUS add a yearly calendar to make an X on each day I meet my primary goals (adopted from Tina- and she read about it via Jerry Seinfeld)

-FOCUS on my one little word throughout the day: RELEASE (LET THAT SHIT GO)

-WRITE and use my new calendar to document thoughts and ideas

-Drink hot tea in the evenings when trying to settle the soul/hot lemon water

-READ for 10-15 minutes a day (or listen to audio book)

-Work on 1 new routine with each Hayes & Hope

-De-Clutter: go through one box/area per week

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-HEALING – trying to focus on THIS daily and finding resources to help heal from all the loss

I feel really good about getting this all typed out finally. It was pulling at me all week last week.... GRATEFUL to start this journey of focusing on new habits and getting back to old ones that were always good. Focusing on healing... and finding what's good for my mind, body, and soul. 

PEACE OUT....

Here's a book I found on-line that made me laugh OUT LOUD... it's the cover and then a few chapter  head pages.... I bought it for motivation as well:

WOOHOOO... I STARTED TODAY... and I got all the things I wanted to get accomplished done... SO I GET TO put an X on my calendar and mark my workout calendar with a check mark. YOU GOTTA START SOMEWHERE!!!!!!!!

And.... this evening I put my routine goals on the back of a quote and laminated it.... WOOHOO!!!!

Here are the themes for each month:

• January - The best time for new beginnings is now
• February - Before anything else, find yourself, be yourself and love yourself
• March - All you need is tea and warm socks
• April - Water your roots so your soul can blossom
• May -  The difference between a flower and a weed is judgment
• June - Believe you can and your halfway there
• July - Bold stripes, bright stars, brave hearts
• August - We are who we choose to be
• September - Sometimes we can learn and study & know, and sometimes we have to believe, trust and hope
• October - We can't become what we want by remaining what we are
• November - Small seeds of gratitude will provide a harvest of hope
• December - Unexpected kindness is the most powerful, least costly, and most underrated agent of hope

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